Two Saturdays ago, hundreds of individuals of all ages came together in Arcadia, Indiana, to pay tribute to one man who truly personified the meaning of the words friendship, family, and fatherhood.
If anyone needed to see what type of impact the late Anthony “Tony” Etchison had on those who met him and knew him, one needed to look no further than what I saw first hand that first November Saturday of 2019.
As would be fitting for an Indiana high school basketball star who played in front of sellout crowds throughout his four varsity seasons at Noblesville that saw him twice earn Hamilton County Player of the Year honors while leading the Miller program to three consecutive sectional championships (1989, 1990, and 1991), the final tribute to Etchison-who passed away on October 23-was a fitting one to a man who made such a positive mark in so many lives. Hence it was not surprising to see many come from near and far to line the halls for over two hours to in order to enter the local middle school gym and pay their respects to his beloved wife and high school sweetheart Toby as well as their children J.P., Gus, and Tillman.
The names and faces included familiar ones from his Noblesville High School days that supported “Etch” throughout his life and vice versa. His Miller basketball teammates and classmates Sarber, Duvall, Haffner and Dr. Powell were there to give support just as they had in many prior hoops battles beforehand. Same with older teammates Edens and Morris as well as younger teammate White and classmates The Brothers Thurston, Lutz and Wiles. Toby had comfort from classmates and Lady Miller softballers alike such as Bunch, Riley, Williams, Rich and Zook. All were there to pay their respects and say their goodbyes to a good man who left this planet too soon. Yet their presence ensured that Etchison’s impact to those individuals in the multiple roles of teammate, classmate, friend, and family man will never be forgotten.
Their presence also confirmed that as Etchison’s memory and legacy brought them together for that one final tribute to a man who treated everyone like human beings and equals. It mattered not a damn bit what one’s social status was in the Reagan-Bush era of Noblesville High; as multiple articles in the Indianapolis Star have noted in recent weeks, Etchison consistently treated everyone with respect and dignity no matter how they might act or how they might be treated by their peers.
Reason for that last paragraph? Personal experience.
Reason for that last sentence being in bold? Personal need to do something that I should have done over a quarter of a century ago in person to one of the best-if not THE best-all-around individuals I have ever met past, present, and future.
That need is to thank Tony Etchison for how he positively impacted my life.
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It is fitting enough that when I first met Tony Etchison in the winter of 1982-83 (our fourth grade year) it was in the midst of two Noblesville Boys Club basketball teams practicing in an elementary school gym that is just down the street from where this is being typed.
I was on the yellow shirted Haffner X-Ray squad coached and sponsored by Dick Haffner (father of classmate and future Etchison teammate and sectional champ Cory) with a helping hand from the late Gary Duvall (father of classmate and future Etch teammate/sectional champ Gary II). If memory serves correctly Tony was the one-man wrecking crew and league’s best overall player for the white shirted Don Hinds Ford sponsored team. I knew the Etchison name from his older brothers Tim and Eric being formidable local high school hoopsters (Tim and Eric first together at Hamilton Heights, Eric later at Noblesville) and therefore knew who he was from association. He of course had no idea who in the blue f— this fat little kid with coke bottle glasses (aka the writer) was that was attempting to talk basketball with him at the water fountain since his previous sightings of fat little kid on a basketball court was in Boys Club games where said fat kid would shove his formidable gut out to set a pick on somebody so Haffner or Duvall could successfully score. (As Haffner X-Ray won the league’s city regular season title, it worked. As said fat kid scored 2 points the entire year on one for one field goal shooting, safe to say said fat kid’s in-game action was not going to woo any college scouts.) Yet instead of telling the fat kid to lay off the Snickers or hold off on the 2 for 1 Little Ceasar’s pizzas, Tony made small talk before excusing himself to go back to dominating his teammates in the half of the gym where they were practicing at. As Tony would go on to regularly score 20 points plus a game in Boys Club action (memory has a typical game having Tony score all 22 of the team’s points and being the only one who could make a shot), one could see greatness even then. When it came to the game of basketball, Tony Etchison was special. Simple as that.
While that initial conversation did not immediately lead to yours truly regularly hanging out with Tony, the presence of being obese Coke-bottle glasses wearing pick-setter for Duvall and Haffner did. The three of them would team up to participate in and dominate the Boys Club’s spring three on three hoops league sporting said Haffner X-Ray gear; in the midst of said domination, the Haffner-Duvall duo decided that they needed a statistician to keep track of the squad’s offensive dominance. Enter said obese Coke-bottle glasses wearing pick-setter to sit in the upper deck of the old Boys Club gym and do said stat keeping. Hence Tony’s first major impact of my life as I began my statistician career via scoring his field goals and relaying them to him and his mother Lavonne after games. Hence I was known to the Etchison family from then on as the boy who kept stats.
Elementary school turned to junior high, and I then got to know Tony a lot better via being in his math and social studies classes as well as being a manager of the eighth grade basketball team that Tony (as the team’s top scorer) would lead to victory in the 1987 Hamilton County Tourney championship (pictured below).
Two things of note: first, while yours truly got more and more unpopular while getting wider and wider, as top basketball star Tony nonetheless treated me not like a piece of garbage but as a peer an and equal-he was always nice and respectful to me whereas others were not since yours truly was rivaling then Chicago Bears icon William ‘The Refrigerator’ Perry for waist size. Secondly, Tony played the biggest role in ensuring our junior high graduation night was at that point the biggest night of my life. Whereas most others gave less than two s–s about me winning the class Lions Club award that night (mainly because in fairness that award was not exactly in the league of the Heisman Trophy for notoriety) Tony and his then-girlfriend of the time Candi Streich found me at the after-ceremony graduation dance to congratulate me….and the blonde bombshell Streich gave me my first ever hug from a female classmate. Needless to say, I had a smile on my face the rest of the evening. And rest of the weekend. And, of course, now, because five foot four 200 pound 14 year old dudes with 1960s Beatles haircuts weren’t exactly in demand on the dating scene in 1987 central Indiana.
Speaking of Streich….some trivia: in my seventh grade science class (she and Tony dated in eighth grade and broke up afterwards) Streich sat at the table next to me and Andy Cambridge. The connection to Tony? Her tablemate. It was the first time I ever met and knew Tony’s high school sweetheart and future bride Toby Stretch, who made sure to keep me and Cambridge in line when we were goofing off in class-or at least me because I was scared s—less of her. She also joined Tony in the annals of junior high basketball stardom as pictured below:
With past photos presented, this leads to the need for me to cut to the chase and note the time that Tony made his greatest personal impact on me-high school.
To be blunt, anyone who may have read this blog in the past knows that I detested the vast majority of my four years at Noblesville High School (known on this blog as The Sonland). The vast majority of my memories from being there? Not good. I’ve whined about it on more than one occasion (specifically this occasion about the c—-s in my freshman classes known as The Eight Sons). But there was one individual-only one-in my freshman English class that treated me with respect and talked to me instead of insulting me for my weight. Quite frankly if not for Tony I would not have made it through that class, period. I never thanked him for it, so this is that time to do so.
When I made the life changing-and ultimately life saving-decision thirty years ago that I needed to drop some weight and get away from the negativity that I had dealt with for the first two years of my high school experience, it is no coincidence that I had a better time of things-in main part because I got to be re-acquainted with Tony as well as his main men Sarber, Duvall, and Haffner by being in their classes as well as being basketball statistician. It is also no coincidence that my grades improved, my mood improved, my weight continued to drop, and lastly I actually started looking forward to going to school as opposed to dreading it. I remember working with Tony on a marketing class project and remember him both encouraging me and complimenting me on the work I did to make changes and lose weight while getting out of the shell that I allowed myself to crawl into my first two years of high school. I also got the chance to know Toby and no longer be scared of her; Toby was also always nice to me-which I admittedly was not used to after said first two years of being told the opposite-and that meant the world to me as well.
Looking back at my last two years of high school, it is again no coincidence that most of my good memories were due to or being around Tony. Looking back even further also means realizing a simple truth: if I had gotten off of my fat a– to be around good people such as Tony, Sarber, Haffner, Duvall, et al., then those first two years of high school would have been a hell of a lot better, period. Being around positive people who make a positive impact is self-explanatory. And no one personified positivity like Anthony “Tony” Etchison. Period.
And if one wants to know what the highlight of my senior graduation night open house was, simply see below photo:
That meant as much to yours truly then as it does while typing this now.
I only saw Tony twice afterwards after that weekend of high school graduation open houses. Once was when I went to visit him at Etchison Farms in Arcadia during the summer of 1992 after my first year of undergrad at college number one; the last time was twenty years ago when I ran into him on Clinton Street near downtown Noblesville as I was wandering back from visiting the local bank. Both times I never took the opportunity to thank him for being a good friend as well as for having my back all those years when others treated me like a piece of s–t. And multiple times to my non-credit I would make excuses about visiting him or calling him such as ‘he’s got family stuff’ or ‘he’s coaching’ or so on. Even though I thought of Tony and Toby every time I drove through Arcadia and kept track of his honors such as him making the Hamilton County Basketball Hall of Fame or the state’s Silver Anniversary basketball team a few years ago, nonetheless I made excuses or prioritized school work or something else.
After Tony’s passing last month, there were no more excuses. I knew I had to go to Arcadia two Saturdays ago, PhD seminar paper or no PhD seminar paper due that day. I spent roughly three to four hours at the gym and in Arcadia before returning back to wrap said paper up at 11 pm with an hour to spare. But before getting said paper finalized to turn in, none other than Sadie the Shihtzu got revved up and demanded an extra walk. I of course gave in and let Sadie lead the way.
Sadie’s destination: the same elementary school gym where I first met Tony, of course.
God bless Tony Etchison. May he rest in peace. And thank you for personifying what grace, dignity, and class is all about.
Prayers to Toby and the entire Etchison family.
Lastly link to memorial contributions for the Tony Etchison Memorial Fund here
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Jeff
fitzthoughtsblog
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